hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize