I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
