i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize