do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
