I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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