what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
