We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
