I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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