I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
