I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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