I wish I could punch you in the face.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
