69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
