Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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