"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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