dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
