we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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