Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
