Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
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...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
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She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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