2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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