Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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