Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
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You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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