What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
The uberlube is also flammable
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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