he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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