Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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