So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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