drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
