and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
