he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
