Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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