I must be too annoying 4 u.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize
