God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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