It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
