i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Is this like a preordered booty call?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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