Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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