i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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