: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
