they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize