is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
