i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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