Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again

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  (810): I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again http://tfl.nu/f45r
  Replies (1) Good night (1609) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf

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  (647): she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf http://tfl.nu/59j2
  Replies (10) Good night (858) Bad night (1082)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)

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  (303): Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;) http://tfl.nu/s5za
  Replies (14) Good night (2605) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  my computer doesn't work...

  (619): View more from California

  why?

  (419): View more from Ohio

  i puked on it last night

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  (419): my computer doesn't work... (619): why? (419): i puked on it last night http://tfl.nu/kifb
  Replies (4) Good night (905) Bad night (2467)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you

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  (321): You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you http://tfl.nu/ey1b
  Replies (71) Good night (3872) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?

  (1-216): View more from Ohio

  Lol no its called college

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  (216): Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER? (1-216): Lol no its called college http://tfl.nu/1cpq
  Replies (44) Good night (3614) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.

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  (412): You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night. http://tfl.nu/f2ed
  Replies (14) Good night (7396) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.

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  (630): Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself. http://tfl.nu/qlu7
  Replies (42) Good night (5990) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"

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  (519): we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault" http://tfl.nu/rtah
  Replies (7) Good night (4813) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.

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  (425): He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me. http://tfl.nu/6hfm
  Replies (18) Good night (4846) Bad night (2217)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.

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  (650): I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program. http://tfl.nu/1rj5
  Replies (14) Good night (5083) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.

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  (970): going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after. http://tfl.nu/sghm
  Replies (8) Good night (4034) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college

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  (801): Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college http://tfl.nu/xwrm
  Replies (8) Good night (2704) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.

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  (425): I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck. http://tfl.nu/ljdy
  Replies (0) Good night (659) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.

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  (585): we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia. http://tfl.nu/scs1
  Replies (1) Good night (725) Bad night (255)

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