IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
