I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
