East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
