Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.