I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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