Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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