party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
home. puking in laundry basket.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
