This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
