At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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