real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize